// February 22nd, 2014 // Slice of Life

Walking DreadI saw it, I thought I knew where it was, but it wasn’t there.  I’ll probably find it in after the season is over – isn’t that how it works?

Today was the first game of my Softball league. Our team, The Walking Dread, have been practicing for 3 months. It was a long wait but finally the night came where we were all together as a team and got to play.

I was looking forward to playing under Friday Night Lights all week. That’s an understatement. I’ve been looking forward to play for three months to be close to exact. I was ready and excited. Nervous? Nope. Just happy that tonight was the night we could play together as a team.

I drove home from working with a list in my head of things to do. Top of the list was – find my sliding pants and cup.

In my head I knew exactly where it was.

It wasn’t there.

I couldn’t find my cup…

What the FRICK!

I went to the garage.

Not there.

Checked my paintball gear bag.


Checked my drawer of athletic gear.


Why is it that I feel I just saw it last week and on the day I need it it’s not where I believe I saw it?


W H Y ? ? ?

Okay, so it started off bad. But what the hell. I’ll just be careful…

Careful with the family jewels? That’s like an accident waiting to happen…

Well, it wasn’t the accident that happened – it was something ‘related’ so-to-speak – but it wasn’t getting nailed in the you-know-what.

My first at bat I hit a grounder to short. Guess what – I beat it out. Seriously… the old Glenn speed kicked in and I gutted it out to first base right before the throw… I was on base.

The next couple of things was a blur – but I remember feeling a tinge of uncomfortableness in the… ahem… groin area while I stood on 3rd base.

I went from 1st to 3rd and don’t remember 2nd.

I did some haphazard stretches on 3rd and then the ball was hit. I took off for 3rd and the pain shot through me like a… like a… like a fricken knife stabbing my crotch area as I tried to run.

I barely beat the throw in but I managed to score with a couple of cuss words.

It hurt bad.

I’ve never felt THAT pain before.

I tried to walk it out and suck it up but nope… my crotch wasn’t having it.

I ended up booting two grounders at short and was moved to a less ‘active’ position: 2nd base.

It was at the end of that inning, an inning where the other team racked up runs because of brainless errors, that I thought – I waited 3months for this? Suck it up Glenn. I used to fight in pain and fight all night if I had to… this is softball. I can suck it up and deal with the pain tomorrow.

So I went back to short in the next inning and managed to scoop up about 3 hard grounders and throw runners out.

But that’s not what this is all about.

This is about age.

I’m 46.

I battled a lower back injury all week and was able to play and then, out of the blue, my groin decides to “F” me up.

Yes it hurts.

Yes I’m a bit perturbed that after 3 months of practice I might miss next Friday’s game. But I’m a fast healer…


Am I?

I’m 46.

I ‘was’ a fast healer. Now I’m a 46 year old dealing with aches and pains and I’m not sure I’m a fast healer anymore.

We will see.

I have ice on that sensitive area right now.

Icing your crotch area isn’t a very comfortable feeling. I can’t even have a mental ‘happy place’ with ice in that area. I just have to suck it up and keep the swelling down and pray for healing powers that be…

I’m also praying for rain in 7 days.

Yes, 7 days from now, if it rains, it gives me an extra week of recovery.

Pray for rain.

Oh… and pray I find my cup.

Stay tuned… this could get interesting.


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